The talk is a little long buuuuut probably not awful? I thought it was alright. Sooo you can read it if you'd like.
Who are we? We are daughters of our Heavenly Father, who
loves us, and we love Him. We aren’t Nephites. We aren’t members of handcart
companies. A lot of us will live long lives without crippling physical
afflictions, without major catastrophes. Sometimes our lives don’t seem so
obviously challenging, but that doesn’t mean that life isn’t hard. It is! Every
day, we are faced with a variety of challenges. Illness; choices made by
others; consequences of our own choices; the influence of the adversary. Even good
things can be hard—choosing between those things that are good, better or best;
school; dating; missionary experiences; making the decision each day to be a
disciple of Christ. These things aren’t easy! President Eyring said, “If you
are on the right path, it will always be uphill. The Lord is anxious to lead us
to the safety of higher ground.” These life experiences are given to us to help
us grow, even if it hurts. Something I’m still learning is how to not make
these things harder for myself! I often find myself overthinking, worrying too
much, or letting my fears get in the way of my faith. However, our Heavenly
Father loves us. Because He loves us, He has given us the tools we need to
overcome the challenges we’re given. These divine tools can help to build our
challenges into life-shaping experiences. Heavenly Father is anxiously waiting
to help us, but we need to invite Him into our lives. Albus Dumbledore once
said, “Help will always be given at Hogwarts to those who ask for it.”
Regrettably, we aren’t at Hogwarts, but the same principle still applies. Help
will always be given to those who ask for it. I’d like to talk today about a
few of the tools that I have learned to use in my life; tools that are
available to everyone to help us through our challenges.
1. Priesthood
blessings—our very own instruction manual
Our Father in Heaven loves us so much that He has
provided a way to communicate to us directly and personally. We can receive counsel, direction, comfort and
revelation from our Father through a priesthood holder. How incredible is that?
It took me a few years and a few challenges to figure out just how powerful and
how sweet these blessings can be.
Story time: When I was 13, I broke my foot. It was
General Conference weekend in October, and just before the closing song of the
Saturday afternoon session, I grabbed a scooter and headed over to
Blankinship’s house to play with Emily. She had run back into her house to get
something, and as I was riding around outside, I fell and shattered a few bones
in my foot. Truth be told, I learned quite a few lessons that day: one should wear
real shoes when riding a scooter, not just flip flops; and don’t ditch out of
General Conference early to go play with friends. (My brother Nick would
probably also add “don’t take your little brother’s scooter without asking…”)
The next couple of months were pretty miserable. I was on
crutches for six weeks, I couldn’t carry my own backpack around school, and I
couldn’t easily go hang out with friends. I was often sick, I recall getting
checked out of school a bit and spending a lot of time in bed. I felt lonely
and pretty down. Several times, my dad, in his wisdom, offered me a priesthood
blessing. Maybe he didn’t ask all that much, but the way I remember it now, eight
years later, I could swear he asked if he could give me a blessing every single
day until, a couple of weeks after the incident, I finally told him to stop
asking. Why would I need a priesthood blessing? It was just a broken foot, it
would heal. I’d probably had a back-to-school father’s blessing a few weeks earlier;
certainly I wouldn’t need another one. I was a 13-year-old girl who was
positive she could handle it all on her own. Looking back now, it’s pretty
clear that I could’ve used a little divine help during that time.
Fast forward five years, to the weekend of October
General Conference. I had graduated from high school about four months before
and had just started college at Weber, which was my third choice of schools,
the backup I had never really planned on. However, I was insistent that I would
make the very most of this third choice—I was taking five classes on campus,
two institute classes, and had two part-time jobs. Most of my friends had moved
away to school and I felt pretty lonely, but I’m not sure I would’ve had time
to hang out with them anyway! I felt like I was drowning. This time, I was an
18-year-old girl who, again, was positive she could handle it all on her own.
However, I quickly realized I couldn’t handle it for very long, and that
weekend was when it all came crashing down. I was talking with a friend,
telling her about all of the things that were wrong with my life, and she
suggested that I ask my dad for a priesthood blessing. Um…no thanks? Try again.
She told me to ask my bishop…my dad had been called as the bishop just a week
or two before.
It took some time for me to talk myself into it: I had to
keep telling myself that it was okay to ask for help, especially from my dad.
That’s what he’s there for! It’s not a crime to acknowledge that we can’t do
everything by ourselves. In fact, a lot of things become easier when we realize
that we can’t make it through this life on our own, and we don’t have to. That
night, I received counsel from both my earthly father and my heavenly father. I
don’t remember much of what was said, but I remember feeling so much peace and
love from my father. I knew what I needed to do to move forward and to simplify
my life a bit. I quit one of my jobs, I vowed that I’d never take that many
classes again in one semester (and I haven’t!), and I finally felt like I had a
bit of a better grasp on this new chapter of my life.
Neither of these experiences was particularly enjoyable.
Like most of our challenges, those aren’t times in my life that I would care to
repeat. However, I don’t know what it would’ve taken for me to gain a testimony
of priesthood blessings if those things hadn’t happened. Not only am I grateful
for a father and a bishop who is worthy of holding the priesthood and willing
to help, but I’m grateful for a heavenly father who has provided this tool for
us. It’s such a personal way for us to learn that Heavenly Father is aware of
us and of our situation. He knows exactly what we’re going through, and
priesthood blessings are just one of the ways that Heavenly Father can guide
us, especially in the challenging times in our lives.
2. Our own
spiritual preparation and testimony
If we were comparing these divine tools to physical tools
that we might find in our garage, I think our spiritual preparation would be
our bike pump. We wouldn’t try to go for a bike ride with a flat tire.
Personally, I probably wouldn’t go without a water bottle or my headphones
either. It’s the same with any other sport or activity—we want to be prepared! Why,
then, would we try to make it through tough times without being spiritually prepared, spiritually pumped
up? In a talk titled “The Strength to Endure,” Elder Richard J. Maynes said
this:
“When we face adversity in life
and our desire is to emulate the attributes of Jesus Christ, it is essential to
be spiritually prepared. Being spiritually prepared means we have developed
spiritual stamina or strength—we will be in good shape spiritually. We will be
in such good shape spiritually that we will consistently choose the right. We
will become immovable in our desire and ability to live the gospel. As an
anonymous author once said, ‘you must become the rock the river cannot wash
away.’”
We know that now is the time for us to prepare, we hear
that all the time. And I think we know what it is we need to do to build our
spiritual stamina—it’s those small things we do each day that build us up. We
pray, we study, and we act. When challenges come, it’s important that we
continue to do those things the Lord has asked, because He knows that they will
help and protect us. We can’t afford to be casual—we need to pump it up!
I love what Elder Kevin Pearson said in his talk this
past General Conference:
“Life’s journey is challenging.
It’s easy to be distracted, wander off the path, and get lost. Tribulation is
an inevitable and indispensable part of our eternal progression. When adversity
comes, don’t let something you don’t fully understand unravel everything you do
know. Be patient, cling to truth; understanding will come. Trials are like
great mists of darkness that can blind our eyes and harden our hearts. Unless
we are “continually holding fast” to the word of God and living it, we will
become spiritually blinded rather than spiritually minded. Search the Book of
Mormon and the words of the living prophets every day, every day, every day!
It’s the key to spiritual survival and avoiding deception. Without it, we are
spiritually lost.”
Let’s talk about Nephi and his brothers for a minute. We
know that Laman and Lemuel’s reactions were usually less preferable to Nephi’s
“go and do” attitude. That family was asked to do a lot of difficult things.
Their lives weren’t easy! But they were all in it together, so why would Laman
and Lemuel react so differently from Nephi? I like to think that it’s because
Nephi was prepared. Certainly he didn’t always understand why the Lord was
asking certain things of them. In fact, in 1 Nephi 11, the spirit of the Lord
asks Nephi “Knowest thou the condescension of God?” Nephi replies, “I know that
he loveth his children; nevertheless, I do not know the meaning of all things.”
It will often be the case that we don’t understand why
certain things are happening in our lives. As much as we’d love those instant
answers of “Why is this happening to me?” it definitely takes a lot of faith to
move forward with the courage of Nephi, with the “go and do” attitude. As we
spiritually prepare, as we build our testimonies, our faith will increase.
Elder Pearson said that our trials can blind us and harden our hearts. However,
as we use this tool Heavenly Father has given us—our knowledge and testimony—we
can come out on the other side of our challenges and be better for it.
3. Friends
Our friends are our duct tape. When it seems like our
life is falling apart, our friends can help put us back together. I have always
felt so blessed to be surrounded by such amazing people. When I need someone to
listen, someone to laugh with, someone to entertain me, counsel me, or just sit
next to me, they’re there. Again, we can’t do everything on our own, and we
don’t have to. We’re not where we are by chance. God has surrounded us with
good people for a reason. Our friends are here to build us up and help us move
forward in life. When I think of what brings me happiness or what motivates me,
I think of my friends. One of my favorite quotes from Elder Holland is this:
“Times are not always difficult, and when trials come we can get past them more
quickly if we remember happiness.” I think that one of the greatest ways we can
“remember happiness” is to remember our friends. When I’m trying to fix
something in my house, my mind immediately goes to duct tape. So it can be with
our friends.
I’ve been home from my mission for about a year and a
half, and I was only on my mission for about eight months. During those eight
months, I found some of the greatest friends I could ever hope to have. There’s
something about facing challenges together that bonds us. One of my favorite
mission friends is Christine Sims, who I actually knew before our
missions—she’s from Kaysville! She and I were transferred into the same area on
my birthday, and it was one of the greatest presents I ever could’ve asked for.
We weren’t actually companions, but the three months we spent together were so
much fun. We would always joke that it was too bad we had to move across the
world to become best friends, but I’m so glad that we did.
During that time, I was companions with Sister Harris,
who had been companions with Christine just a few transfers before. Sister
Harris and I had a few struggles during our first transfer together: we didn’t
always understand each other, I didn’t feel like she valued our companionship,
and sometimes, we just didn’t see eye to eye. During our second transfer
together, things improved a ton and we really enjoyed being together. But in
those first few weeks, I was so glad to have Christine around. Not only did she
and her companion lighten the mood and make those hard days a bit more
bearable, but because she’d already been companions with Sister Harris, she
knew exactly how I was feeling. Just knowing there was someone who understood
what was going on in my life made that challenge so much easier to bear. She
wasn’t able to fix anything for me, but having her around was the support that
Sister Harris and I needed as we worked through our initial challenges and
progressed into a strong companionship.
Like I said, after those first few weeks, Sister Harris
and I started having a wonderful time together. We were laughing more together
and seeing more success in our work. We were setting fun goals together, like
memorizing the French national anthem, singing through the entire French hymn
book in one transfer, finding all five of the new Magnum bars (which are the
best ice cream bars in the entire world) and playing contacting games to
motivate us to talk to more people. That transfer was a high point in my
mission. However, at the same time, we watched Christine go downhill pretty
quickly. She had struggled with depression for most of her mission, and it hit
her pretty hard during that transfer. Sister Harris and I would come home at
lunch or stop by in between appointments to find Christine in bed and her sweet
companion, Sister Johnson, cleaning, studying, or reorganizing our
maps—whatever she could do to keep busy. Some mornings, we would all just sit
together and cry, because Christine couldn’t stop crying and none of us knew
what to do. I cried even more when she told me that she had decided with our
mission president that she would be going home at the end of the transfer. What
would I do without my new-found best friend? As hard as it was, we both knew it
was what needed to happen in her life, and as we said goodbye for the last time
(as I bawled on a train platform in Southern France…), I knew it was going to
be alright.
Fast-forward another transfer: it was the end of my
fourth transfer, the beginning of my fifth. I was starting my second transfer
with another favorite mission friend, Sister Jess Everett, in Carcassonne,
France. Jess and I had just had a
wonderful transfer together, and I was so thrilled when my mission president
called to say that we’d be together another six weeks. I struggled a bit with
some anxiety during my first transfer, but I had been fine for a few months and
everything seemed to be going well. However, within just a couple of weeks, I
felt like I was reliving what happened with Christine, except this time, it was
me. Soon, I was the one who wasn’t getting out of bed, and Jess was the one who
spent her days studying, organizing, cleaning…she and I watched dozens of
training videos, 17 Miracles, any movies we could get our hands on. She was so
patient and understanding, I couldn’t have made it through that time without
her. There were some good days, a lot of not-so-good days. I mostly couldn’t believe
what was happening to me, I didn’t understand it. But I remember being so
grateful that I’d had those experiences with Christine. She was okay, and I was
going to be okay too.
Things continued to go downhill, and before that transfer
was over, I found myself in my mission president’s office and on a plane home
the following day. If there was ever I time that I needed my friends, it was
then. I can’t even begin to tell you how supported and loved I felt. The few
months following my return home were some of the hardest of my entire life,
possibly even harder than what I experienced on my mission, but my friends and
family were there to keep me together, to hold me up. I still remember the
first time I saw Christine after I came back—it felt so good to sit and talk
with her and know that there was someone who completely understood what I was feeling.
I absolutely do not doubt that we were called to the same mission and the same
area for a reason.
I feel the same way about Christine that I do about all
of my friends—we’re here together for a reason. Heavenly Father knows what and who we need in this life. He has
given us these tools—our friends—as a source of comfort, wisdom and love.
Girls, if you’re wondering who your friends are, take a look around you. You’re
all part of the Ponds Park ward Young Women right now for a reason. This time
of life is not an easy one, we know that. Lean on these friends when you need
them, and be there for them when they need you. I promise that out of this
group will come some wonderful, life-long relationships. Never underestimate
the power of your friends.
4. The Savior
There will be challenges we face in our lives that we
don’t understand. There will be times when nothing feels sure, when we just
don’t know what to do. And there may be times when we’re sure that no one else
could possibly understand what we’re going through. But there is someone who
will always understand, and that’s our Savior. He’s our spiritual handyman, and
we can call on him at any time at all, to fix our broken hearts and to help us
through our challenges. There is nothing
he doesn’t understand. He has overcome everything. We can’t make it through our
challenges, or through this life, alone. And
we don’t have to. He is there, not only to comfort us and carry us, but to
help us become who we’re supposed to be. The challenges of life may sometimes
seem to be more than we can bear, but with the Savior, these challenges can be
experiences that shape our lives and help us to become more like Him. In a talk
titled “I Will Not Fail Thee, nor Forsake Thee,” President Monson said this:
“Only the Master knows the
depths of our trials, our pain, and our suffering. He alone offers us eternal
peace in times of adversity. He alone touches our tortured souls with His
comforting words:
“Come unto me, all ye that
labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.
“Take my yoke upon you, and
learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart; and ye shall find rest unto your
souls.
“For my yoke is easy, and my
burden is light.”
Whether it is the best of times
or the worst of times, He is with us. He has promised that this will never
change.”
The Savior is the best friend we will ever have. Because
of the Atonement, the Savior can help us through anything. This doesn’t mean
that all of our challenges will just go away or that everything will be fixed
all at once. We’re here to progress, and the Savior is there to walk us through
our challenges. As we rely on Him in faith, these challenges will not only move
us forward, but upward. Like President Eyring said, “the Lord is anxious to
lead us to higher ground.”
I don’t think we’ll ever be able to understand just how
much our Heavenly Father loves us. Let’s do our best to remember him always,
and to remember that we are not alone in our challenges. I’m so thankful for
the tools He has provided for us to help us through this life. We will be made
better through each of our life experiences. I pray that we can always remember
that with the Lord, we can do all things.
